Change your identity, change your life
Redefining Your Identity: The Key to Breaking Free from Binging
“When you have repeated a story to yourself for years, it is easy to slide into these mental grooves and accept them as fact… [Therefore] progress requires unlearning. Becoming the best version of yourself requires you to continuously edit your beliefs, and to upgrade and expand your identity” (James Clear, Atomic Habits).
These words struck a chord with me, as they likely will with anyone who has struggled with self-limiting beliefs. For so long, I identified as someone who struggled with food—someone who couldn’t trust herself around sugar or junk food, someone who had to rely on strict diets to compensate for an inability to nourish her body intuitively. I told myself I would always struggle to achieve my ideal body and that food and weight would forever dominate my thoughts. These beliefs became so ingrained that they felt like facts. And every time I tried to break free from the cycle of binging and restricting, I inevitably found myself back at square one.
But as I read James Clear’s words, I realized something profound: the issue wasn’t just the behaviors of binging and restricting. It was deeper than that. The real issue was how I saw myself—my identity. I had unknowingly labeled myself as someone who was consumed by food-related struggles, and my behaviors naturally aligned with that identity. Every time I made progress, those subconscious beliefs pulled me back, whispering that this was who I was.
The Power of Redefining Who You Are
Why did I have to identify as someone who binged and restricted? Why did my identity revolve around food and my body? Those questions sparked a shift in my thinking. Inspired by Clear’s hypothesis, I asked myself: Who do I actually want to be?
Clear suggests that lasting change comes when we define the type of person we want to become and then collect evidence that supports that identity. So, I started to define myself. I wrote down who I wanted to be:
- I am strong, hardworking, fit, and healthy.
- I take care of my mind and body with love and respect.
- I am fulfilled by my hobbies, work, and relationships.
- I am confident and at peace with myself.
- I enjoy movement, nourishing meals, and a balanced life.
This new identity left no room for binging or restrictive behaviors. When old patterns and urges crept in, I began to ask myself: Would my best self engage in this behavior? The answer was always clear. My dream self wouldn’t binge to the point of physical and emotional discomfort. She would go for a walk, call a friend, dive into a creative project, or read a book.
The Beauty of Growth
Here’s the beautiful truth about life: nothing stays the same. You have the power to redefine who you are at any moment. Progress doesn’t require perfection—it requires persistence. While I still face setbacks and old thoughts occasionally resurface, I no longer feel lost. I know exactly who I’m working toward, and that clarity is empowering.
If you want to change your binging behavior, start with your identity. Take five minutes to reflect and write down the characteristics of your dream self. Use “I am” statements to describe this version of you vividly. What does she wear? How does she spend her time? What are her routines, her hobbies, and her affirming beliefs? You can even create a Pinterest vision board to help bring this person to life.
Moving Forward, Day by Day
Changing your identity won’t happen overnight—it’s a process that unfolds one day, one choice at a time. But the more you align your actions with your new identity, the stronger and more confident you’ll become in this version of yourself.
The journey isn’t about never slipping up; it’s about knowing where you’re headed and continuing forward even when setbacks occur. Redefine your identity, take small steps each day, and watch as your life transforms in ways you never thought possible. You are capable of becoming the best version of yourself, and it all starts with believing in who you are today.